Chewing Old Soft

Chewing Old Soft is always a male dream, and I am telling you it's pretty enjoyable. For example, I don't have to wake up until noon, then I walk BeeBee. Afterwards, I do lunch with BeeBee in a cheap cafe, then I do my stuffs . . . at around 6:00pm, I go pick up Connie for dinner . . . What a life I am having now!

For those who wanna chew old soft, you must have to following criteria:
1. U gotta be physically dirty. Not brushing teeth, shower only twice a week . . . you know.
2. U gotta be mentally dirty. Be bad all the time, as "man not bad, ladies won't love"
3. U gotta have a cute but ham-sup dog. He must know how to approach girls.
4. U gotta be ugly. Be ugly, as ugly as Bon.
5. U gotta be "gin". Let the girl to be in charge and doing all of the business. As a man, just relax.
6. U gotta be relaxed. Like . . . farting anytime in anywhere.
7. U gotta kick the parents away as far as U can't see. Don't let them safe you from being a jerk.
8. U gotta like eating fish, duck, and goose heads and feet especially, chichen ass. That's style.
9. U gotta be messy. Mess all things up, let the girl do all of the cleanings and fixings.
10. U gotta find a girl named, Connie

Alright, I think I have already spoken the key to success of chewing old soft. So, I better stop here, waiting to be punished by Connie tonight, after she had seen my blog today. I think I gotta twist ears, ding durian, kneel on broken glasses . . .

Connie Ko

For those who likes to read my blog should know that I have a girlfriend recently. She is lovely, sweet, caring, and . . . hum~~~ to me she is close to perfect. Why not perfect? What's missing? She's not perfect because of having me as her boyfriend! For those of you who are nosy enough, there is an image of Connie below.

Universal Communication

How many people know any dog that can really hear and understand human spoken language? I have one right next to me, and he's BeeBee.

Connie and I have realized that he understands our speaking recently. BeeBee is now living with Connie and I in an extremely tiny apartment. We are a lovely family. In the beginning, I was scared that BeeBee shits all around the apartment, so I told him not to shit at all in Chinese. He didn't shit in those days except while we walked him. This morning, I told BeeBee in person that I worry for him. I don't mind him shitting in the apartment, but it has to be on the diaper. This afternoon, when Connie came back home, she told me that BeeBee shitted on the diaper! Moreover, this morning, when I told BeeBee that I have to go China for today and tomorrow, he cried immediately . . .

BeeBee's Resume/CV
Objective: Living at the WanKoBee home happily.
Name: BeeBee
Place Of Birth: Hong Kong
Date Of Birth: August 16, 2005
Type: Pomeranian
Language: Cantonese
Living History:
1. HongKong, China (2005 - 2006)
2. DongGuan, China (2006 - 2007)
3. HongKong, China (2007 - Recent)
Personal Experience:
• Being in jail at TaiKokTsui for 1 year
• Many joyful 100P+ nights with age 18-22 girls (cooler than AV)
• 1 fights 8+ giants dogs at TaiKokTsui Park
• Operating trafficking (smuggling) business
• Peeing and shitting in the center of street anytime
• Licking girls on streets randomly anytime
• Loves to drink Eiswein

Improbable Dream

I have a dream . . . my dream is to have a dream. Currently, I dreamed to live happily together with Connie and BeeBee, so I dreamed. I am not a person who likes to dream only without action, so I have made up a poem of my dream. The title of the poem is Improbable Dream. It's a DaDaism free verse without rhythm and rhyme (DaDaism means something without meaning, theme, and doesn't make any sense). Oh, by the way, for those of you that don't know . . . I have taken Art History and English Literature in Form 5 and College, so please enjoy.

Improbable Dream

I dreamed of Connie and BeeBee,

China and Hong Kong, a way and a date,

a car and a boat, a driver and a sailor,

a dorm and a home, big and small,

afternoon and mid-night, fish and crab,

Sheet and Fire, giving and taking,

going and waiting, sitting and standing,

highway and tunnel, gas station and fish market,

excitement and worry, danger and safe,

cigarette and green-tea, dining and drinking,

good and bad, righteous and evil,

cheap and expensive, father and son,

China and British, laws and rules,
government and gang, systems and formats,

following and detouring, continuing and giving up,

happiness and peacefulness, they're all my dreams.

BeeBee's Fate

Tomorrow is the day!

I have quited my fulltime job 2 weeks ago. I am welcome to keep staying at the China apartment that is provided by my ex-employer, but time is running out soon. We came to an agreement of moving out in the end of May. I have no problem on moving out, but shipping BeeBee back to HK is a problem. I have spent $4500.00 (HKD) for shipping him to China, but it will cost me more than $10000.00 (HKD) for shipping him back due to f__king HK animal law!!! I f__king hate the f__ked up HK gov't, which has already requested me to pay more than $10000.00 (USD) tax last year, and now it is f__king asking more money bases on BeeBee! F__k HK gov't. Everything is just money!

Tomorrow is the day!

China - 5000 years culture . . . Top 10

I enjoyed the long weekend with Connie in DongGuan, China. We had a good time together. During our quality time, I have summarized the Top 10 Chinese 5000 cultural practices. Let's share it below.

Chinese 5000 years cultural practices . . . Top 10
#10: Late come first serve (cutting line)
#09: Smoking 24/7
#08: Flying dagger (let go flying knife)
#07: Never say hi and bye
#06: Being loud doesn't mean impolite
#05: Offline driving . . .
#04: Rat is a cool pet
#03: Dog is best served in roasted
#02: Banding motorcycling is the best way to stop robbery
#01: Shitting in the center of the Wal*Mart department store at 8:30pm

Ko Chi Ling

I saw a Chinese poem being hung on the wall of Connie's room. I am not smart enough to understand. No matter what . . . I have translated it into English below. Let's take a look.

Title: Ko Chi Ling
Looking up high and watching far away, there beautiful mountain and river can be seen.
Understanding the meaning of life via wisdom . . . a man sings.
Good figure and sexy body can bring you wealth (money $$$).
Loving brings you happiness.

Honestly speaking, I have no idea what's that poem is about (to me it sounds like a sex thing . . . ), but straight forwardly translating, will be the words above.

Break Starts

I resigned and my last day was March 31, 2007. At this period of time, BeeBee lives with my ex-secretary. That Ham Sup Dog was totally over excited when he saw my ex-sec. He couldn't even stop for a while for not asking for Po Po or Nam Nam! I guess he must be sick of that Heung Ha Po for the last 3 months. On the other hand, I gotta admit that my ex-sec. is quite cute actually, but not my type :)

For the short coming future, I am gonna rest and pack for 2 months (yeah, I am gonna take my time). Then I am gonna go back to US visiting and traveling in June. I am gonna have a 3 months break without income. I don't have much in hand to spend, but still I gotta take this break. Many people worry for my mental status including my parents and Connie . . . I believe that better take their advises.